I learned one of the most important things I needed to know about how to stay sober and be happy in the first few months of my sobriety.
I was at an AA dance without a car and lost my ride home. This guy Corey I knew from meetings said he would give me a ride home. He had a older Firebird (70s ish?) that was pretty fast. So as were driving down Route 1 he is telling me how he stays sober is by going against himself every time he is afraid. Whenever he was afraid to share at a meeting he would force himself to stick his hand up. When he was afraid to share with his sponsor what was in his fourth step he did it anyway. He went against himself.
It stuck. I think it stuck because while he was preaching I was gripping the door handle tight and looking at the speedometer which was reading just over 100mph.
I was afraid to talk to the woman who would become my wife, I was afraid to share the shameful things I did while drinking in my fifth step, I was afraid to go to California to take on a very difficult and technical job that I was convinced I was not qualified for and I was afraid to step out on the stage in front of 1500 screaming metal fans who were not there to see my band.
These are the life changing experiences for me that were all possible because of one alcoholic helping another.