I really have learned the most about myself in the last three years at my new job. It turns out my “nemesis” has been the greatest source of my growth. It has only been through my constant questioning of why I get so pissed at him that I have uncovered some real golden nuggets of knowledge about who I am and how I am around others.
However it is good that I don’t have the ability to shoot lightning out my fingers lest I smoke my source of growth.
We are on our way to be being puppy owners. Gifts of sobriety.
So today was piggy back rides, coloring with dad and because it was so friggin cold, snugglin with dad on the couch. Even the cats stop by for a visit.
Four days off and my batteries are recharged. Hopefully recharged enough to walk the puppy everyday.
So says Ebby to Bill.
And with that a switch in Bill’s head (heart) is flipped and there is now hope of recovery for alcoholics in the world. Bill then humbly offers himself to God as he understood Him and never took another drink. BB pg 13.
My conception of God changed and continues to change in AA. My God loves me and wants me to “get it”. The God I understand has carried me through many difficult times in sobriety and has kept me sober through them all. The God I understand has given me an amazing life in sobriety.
The God I understand wants me to go make pancakes for my kids. 
I walked into a beginners meeting with about three weeks sober and shared. I raised my hand and said I was going out drinking tonight unless someone could talk me out of it.
The guy sitting next to me (Mike B.) had five years at the time and came up to me after the meeting and said he was my new sponsor. He told me that I was to not go out drinking that night because he was going to pick me up the next day and take me to a meeting. He continued to take me to meetings over the next several months, day after day until I was capable of getting myself to a meeting.
He saved my life.
I’m not sure if I would have stayed sober (or alive) if he had not done what he did. Twenty one years ago.
You never know the impact you may have on someones life. Say hi to a newcomer or an old timer who doesn’t come around often. It could make all the difference in the world to them (me).
So just about three weeks ago I started walking on the treadmill again. I added in some stretches from the old karate days and whammo I started feeling great. I’m not tired after lunch and I am sleeping well at night. I have also reduced a lot of the sugar I was eating.
Simple right? You would think I would know this already. As I am sure you know, knowing something and doing it are two different things. Kinda like working the steps, huh?
Anywho, that is where I am at today. I hope y’all are having a pleasant holiday season.
Taking the time these last few weeks to unwind from three years of non-stop life. I’m going back to the basics to get centered again.
Its amazing how simple things can make such a big impact on how I feel day to day.
1. Getting enough sleep
2. Eating breakfast
3. Getting some kind of exercise
4. Talking to friends
5. Playing with my kids
6. Hanging out with my wife
Too much work, I have decided, is NOT good for me.
Balance and Moderation – this I learned from AA.
Apparently you are supposed to take step after step for a certain amount of time on this thing. I thought I bought it five years ago just so it would be a huge pain in the ass to put in the basement and then set up again when I move. I guess I was wrong. 41 and on the tread mill.
Joe
Thinking about a few dietary changes in my life. I quit drinking over twenty years ago, stopped using tobacco over three years ago and now considering not so much sugar in my diet.
That’s what I looked like the last time I stopped eating sugar and drinking coffee. Not pretty I can assure you. If you don’t hear from me for a long time, send cookies.
Ok, so…… since I’m three years old I love guitar and music. It’s my first love. I was consumed with writing songs in my younger days. I played in bands in middle school and high school. I thought I would go to college for music (it never happened). Life goes on. I got sober, finished college (physics degree), married, kids, job, yada yada yada.
I still love music. A few years back I joined a really heavy, metal band and we played some great shows. At the ripe age of 37 I got tired of being the oldest guy in the club and razzed about being old. So I quit the band because I felt I was too old for this stuff.
Fast forward: move to the other side of the country. I still love music. Now I am 41 and want to play music (seeing a pattern here?). Place an ad on craigslist and get a few hits. Go and jam with band #1: no band, just a drummer who has been playing for about a year and not very well. Band#2: egotistical, controlling musician (no thanks). Band #3: sure, come on over, next week, maybe next week, not this week, next week, etc. etc. etc.
I started out really excited. I finally had weekends off after working them for the last three years. Now I have some time to do music. My first attempts at starting up with some musicians has met with dismal failure. I am not even getting responses anymore. Cue the downward spiral music.
So I am disappointed. I really miss playing in a band. I miss playing shows.
